Wednesday, September 3, 2014

The Battles We Wage In Our Heads

I spent the last week wrestling with some stinking thinking.  Like bad thinking.  I tried to change the subject in my mind, used distraction, but the thoughts just kept coming back.  Where did these thoughts come from?  God, I am a terrible person for thinking this.  Why can't I make these thoughts go away?

And because I am slow, it didn't dawn on me that this was just one more in a long string of attacks from the devil that I've experienced in the past year.

Tonight I figured it out.  God, I resist the devil and Your Word says he must flee from me.  Flee, devil!  You have no place in my mind.

Instant peace.

Just like when Hubby prayed for me about all my stinking thinking about homeschooling this school year.  I spent two weeks in agony over the thought of teaching my kids.  I didn't want to.  I didn't think I could.  Every time I thought about it, it made me want to cry.  I kept praying for God to make me stronger.  What I really needed to do was tell the devil to shut up and go away.  Hubby prayed for me and the peace was instant.

I read this quote back in the winter and shared it on here before after my second hospital stay in under 6 months.

If I Were The Devil
By Tommy Nelson

If I was the devil, I'd tell you what I'd do.  I would try to deceive you and get you into error.  I would get you off base.  And if you still stayed true, I would try to disqualify you.  I would get you immoral, I would get you where no one would believe what came out of your mouth.  I would make you a tabloid, where nobody would believe you.  I would remove your confidence until you were afraid to speak because your life was a shamble.  I would get you into sin.  I would prowl like a roaring lion to devour you morally.

And if I couldn't do that, I would try to make you successful.  And I would distract you if I couldn't disqualify you.  I would get you busy.  I would get you so distracted to the gospel that no longer would your prayers be about holiness and souls.  They would only be about the bottom line in your business.  I would get you materialistic, and no longer concerned about the spiritual nature of life.  If I couldn't do that, I would divide you.  If I couldn't divide you, I've almost lost you.  You know what I'd do then?  I'd discourage you.  And then if I couldn't discourage you, I'd try death.  I would try my best to kill you.  That's what I would do to take you out.

So far this year satan has attacked me on almost every single front addressed here.  In every instance, I wallowed in the situation for a few days or weeks before I realized it was an attack and needed serious prayer.

Tonight I asked God: Why am I being attacked so much?  Why am I such a threat to the devil?  I am just one person who doesn't even do much.  I stay home.  I homeschool.  I don't write books.  I don't have a lot of influence.  I'm not important.  I'm just me.  

Because you aren't afraid anymore

I used to be afraid of everything.  People.  Bugs.  Letting my kids out of my sight.  Messing up.  Failure.  Losing my house.  Being poor.  Not having enough food.  Fitting in.  Staying home alone.  That I had an incurable disease.  New things.  The list was endless.  Fear consumed my life.

I am not afraid anymore.  I spent 33 years in bondage to fear, but not anymore.  I will not allow myself to be neutralized ever again.  

If you are like me and find yourself being sidelined with crazy thoughts or situations, don't wallow in it.  Stop and pray.  Command the devil to shut up and flee.  The closer you get to the Lord, the more you say Yes to Him, the bigger target you will become.  Learn to recognize these attacks.  If the thoughts running through your head are crazy talk, if they plague you, that is a dead giveaway that it's not you, but an attack.  If you suddenly find yourself paralyzed with anxiety over something, that is a dead giveaway that it's not you, but an attack.  

Fight.  Daily.  Hourly.  Do not let the devil use your mind as his playground.  Do not allow yourself to be neutralized.  Resist the devil and he must flee.  


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